Discovered a wonderful new juice today. 10 cal/250ml.
Put a cup in a litre of water to not only make my water taste yummy, but to make those 10 cal stretch.
Also picked up some new fare for c&s, sugar-free jello, and fresh spinach.
Jello is in the fridge....jelling...???...lying awake when I know I'm tired, thinking about c&s...feeling hungry and tired. Flipped over to My 600lb Life.
Definitely supressing my hunger pangs. They look like how I feel.
Looking forward to jello tomorrow (it's lime) :)
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Monday, February 20, 2012
Feeling a bit better about things today...gonna go with that momentum and hope for the best.
Stuck to mostly liquids yesterday, but I did eat a small supper with my hubby. Not the greatest choices either, but I had restriction ony mind the whole time, so u am cognizant of my surroundings and what I am doing, and that's important - not to let myself get swallowed up and jaded by hunger, to keep the bigger picture in focus.
Gonna go make more sugar-free jello - a nice cheat for my brain.
Peace and love!
Stuck to mostly liquids yesterday, but I did eat a small supper with my hubby. Not the greatest choices either, but I had restriction ony mind the whole time, so u am cognizant of my surroundings and what I am doing, and that's important - not to let myself get swallowed up and jaded by hunger, to keep the bigger picture in focus.
Gonna go make more sugar-free jello - a nice cheat for my brain.
Peace and love!
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Ahhhh, the familiar comforting pain of the laxative in my system - the cramping, the cold sweats, the shakes, the nausea....punishment for the way I look(ed in those pics from last night).
Convinced my friend to take them down. She obliged, but they are still in existence.
They will always serve as a reminder of my failure, my inability to succeed.
Today is a new day, a fresh start, a new plan of attack.
No more 1/2c fibre cereal for breakfast (my 90 cal for the first half of the day); nope, cutting that our, doing just unsweetened almond milk (35cal/cup), sugar-free jello (10cal/half cup), more laxatives and a small spinach salad for supper.
I'm a fucking failure, as past behaviours predict; however, the glorious thing about being alive is that I have another day to make a change.
Convinced my friend to take them down. She obliged, but they are still in existence.
They will always serve as a reminder of my failure, my inability to succeed.
Today is a new day, a fresh start, a new plan of attack.
No more 1/2c fibre cereal for breakfast (my 90 cal for the first half of the day); nope, cutting that our, doing just unsweetened almond milk (35cal/cup), sugar-free jello (10cal/half cup), more laxatives and a small spinach salad for supper.
I'm a fucking failure, as past behaviours predict; however, the glorious thing about being alive is that I have another day to make a change.
I fucking hate myself.
Just when I feel good and let loose a little bit with friends, allow myself to get caught up in the fun and have a good time, someone's gotta take a picture of my fat ass and post it on facebook for all to see.
This is why I hate going out.
I thought this time might be different.
I was fucking wrong.
I fucked up.
Just when I feel good and let loose a little bit with friends, allow myself to get caught up in the fun and have a good time, someone's gotta take a picture of my fat ass and post it on facebook for all to see.
This is why I hate going out.
I thought this time might be different.
I was fucking wrong.
I fucked up.
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